Forgiveness and Clenched Fists

     A couple of Sundays ago, our worship service emphasized the concept of forgiveness, and our Children's Ministry Director used the illustration of keeping a clenched fist for a length of time as representing when we hold on to anger, resentment, and frustration, etc.  In the end, she had the children unclench their fists and related that to the fact that when we can forgive and let go of the "clenched fists" in our lives, a sense of relief and relaxation usually follows.  I thought it was a particularly fitting representation, but on further consideration, I started to think about how much easier life would be sometimes if we just decided not to let petty differences, disagreements, etc. become a "clenched fist" in the first place!  Of course, human nature dictates that we're not all going to get along 100% of the time and conflict is going to happen that needs to be addressed, but I think it would go a long way toward clearing the air.
     Our pastor also stated in his sermon that true, genuine forgiveness often happens over time, as well as the fact that if one of the parties involved will only take the first step and break the ice by offering forgiveness and acknowledging whatever part they may have played in the disagreement, it would also help in not allowing things to fester (clinching the fist).  I also strongly believe that forgiveness on the part of the wronged party and taking responsibility for any injury on the part of the offending party are not mutually exclusive, and both can happen, although forgiveness at least needs to be extended without necessarily expecting responsibility to be taken.  The bottom line is, a clenched fist just isn't worth it!

Softball and Superheroes

The singles from my church have sometimes taken a night in the summer while our Sanctuary Choir is not rehearsing to go see a movie at a theater which plays just after first-run movies for a discounted price on Wednesdays.  We had planned to do so this past Wednesday, until a member of our Sunday School class invited us to an end-of-season softball game for a local league he is a member of for physically/mentally-challenged players.  So, on the spur of the moment we decided to go there instead, and not only had a great time, we were inspired as well!  The field and adjacent playground are handicap-accessible, and the number of people who came out in support of the players was impressive.  The field does have a scoreboard; however, it wasn't even turned on, which I'm thinking was probably intentional, considering that at least in this particular game, it was quite apparent that the focus was on the players and their enjoyment of participation and not the score.  The league also enlists local volunteers (including a team of girls from a regular league on this night) to serve as running "buddies" for the players.  I'm guessing the teenagers from that team probably picked up on the subtle message that winning isn't everything and that playing for the fun of it should be a primary motivation, because the smiles on their faces were just as wide as the players'!  It was refreshing to see everyone have such a good time, without the unsportsmanlike behavior, etc. that can sometimes mar youth sports.  Who needs to see "Man of Steel" or "Wolverine"?  I believe we saw some superheroes Wednesday night, without even going to the the theater!  Below is a picture:

Lying in the Ditch

     Our sermon in church today focused on the parable of the Good Samaritan and the idea that we can follow in his footsteps (and Jesus' for that matter) only when we identify with the man attacked on the road and left for dead in the ditch.  However, I'm guessing it may also have had an effect on the man if he later discovered it was a Samaritan who helped him, especially if he was a Jew.
     To highlight his point, our Executive Pastor continued by sharing the personal story of having been involved in many funerals and helping to extend words of peace and comfort in times of grief.  But he added that he developed a new appreciation for being on the receiving end when he has faced the passing of several family members in recent years.  I remember my mom feeling the same way when my grandmother died and the church provided a meal in our Fellowship Hall for our family, out-of-town guests and others involved in the service.  My home church is somewhat smaller than the current church I serve and had never really attempted such a bereavement meal program.  My mom was inspired to help formalize and organize a similar program in my home church after experiencing what it meant to her and our family.
     At another point in the sermon, the focus was on fact that according to the culture of the day, Jews and Samaritans just didn't mix (to put it mildly, lol!), and yet the Samaritan was the one who had enough compassion for someone he was supposed to "hate" that he stopped to help.  To take it one step further, it can be quite difficult to show love to someone who has actually mistreated us and not just "different", etc., especially if it's someone we love and know well.  Probably the darkest period of my own life has been as a domestic violence survivor during my short-lived marriage.  It suffices to say there were mental health issues involved with my ex-husband that did not present themselves until after the wedding, eventually leading to a suicide attempt on his part shortly after our divorce was final.  I firmly believe that if God had not brought us together for the time that we were, his family might never have known the extent of his condition, and he might never have been diagnosed/gotten any kind of help.  Even though we have had virtually no contact since then, I continue to pray for him every day and truly hope he is happy.  I put myself in his shoes and know I would be scared, confused, frustrated, etc. to discover that I was capable of physically hurting someone I love and not be able to figure out where the behavior was coming from due to brain chemistry that I have no control over.  My experience has also inspired me to volunteer with our local Family Crisis Center, because I know a little something about what many of the women there are going through.  Today I was reminded it is precisely in times like those that we are to follow the example of the Good Samaritan and really identify with those in need of help.

Picnic and Empowerment

     I recently attended an annual picnic held by our state chapter of the Turner Syndrome Society; it's always such a blessing to connect with others who are affected by the same condition you are, especially when it's so relatively rare.  I am always happy to try and explain TS for anyone who is curious or interested, but sometimes simply presenting the facts doesn't give a complete picture when the condition involves so many hidden factors (non-verbal difficulties, issues with working memory, social awareness, etc.) on top of the most obvious physical trait of short stature.  We share stories of how/when we were diagnosed, the treatment we have undergone and the milestones we have been able to achieve despite having TS, which is always quite empowering and encouraging.  I come away not feeling so alone (it's such a refreshing feeling when most everyone there is as short as you are, lol!), and I think in some small sense, it's God's way of letting me know He understands as well.  It also gives me a clearer perspective on how to relate to others who are "different", reminding me that every person is a child of God, and deserves respect as such, even if we don't necessarily or always understand or agree with them.  Below is a photo:

The Serenity Prayer and Inheriting the Wind

     Today at church, I was able to find some correlations between our morning sermon and a movie study series our pastor began tonight.  This morning, he spoke of the Serenity Prayer, noting that we usually have the hardest time with the "accepting what I cannot change" part.  I can really relate, because if there was anything I could change about myself it's having Turner Syndrome, because of the non-verbal/social difficulties that come with it.  I agree with our pastor when he said that we often need to look inward at our attitudes in coming to terms with the things we cannot change, and trying to make the most of the circumstances we are given.  Sure, having Turner's hasn't been the easiest, but I wouldn't want it any other way, because I think it has given me an empathy for others like myself who have things they can't change about themselves, and a faith that God will help me deal with whatever challenges it presents. 
     Then, tonight, we explored the struggle of science vs. religion by watching clips from "Inherit the Wind", a movie adaptation of the events surrounding the Scopes "Monkey" Trial, where a high school teacher was accused of teaching Darwin's evolutionary theory against state law.  Our pastor pointed out that even today, genetic research is leading to more and more discoveries that can be either positive or negative; in thinking about my own condition, Turner's was only identified in the late 1930's.  Most suspected cases of Turner's can now be confirmed through ultrasound and other types of prenatal testing, and some doctors do recommend termination, since the survival rate is very, very low.  Because the condition involves early cell division, and is not actually inherited, there is really nothing that can be done, even though I'm sure that is being researched.  I'm a firm believer that faith and science can indeed coexist; God is the One who created us with a sense of curiosity and wonder as a means of making some sense of the world He has given us to live in, after all!

Small, BUT Powerful Words

     With last Sunday being Easter, our pastor used Luke's account of that first Resurrection morning to emphasize how the small, 3-letter word but can signal us to pay attention to what comes afterward.  However, he also pointed out that we often interpret that signal to mean that we are free to forget everything that comes before, and used the example of telling someone they did a good job, but, indicating that most likely some criticism is about to follow, which can be a blow to the person's self-esteem and confidence.  While I whole-heartedly agree, I think it benefits us to consider both the positives and negatives of what comes before as well as after the word but, because we don't want to minimize the positive that may have come before and sometimes we definitely need to hear the criticism that comes after.  Luke was trying to make a convincing case for believing in Jesus' resurrection by using one simple word, which can also help us to keep life in perspective.